The sorrow of the damned

I have felt as Mormon describes in Mormon 2:10-13:

10 And it came to pass that the Nephites began to repent of their iniquity, and began to cry even as had been prophesied by Samuel the prophet; for behold no man could keep that which was his own, for the thieves, and the robbers, and the murderers, and the magic art, and the witchcraft which was in the land.

11 Thus there began to be a mourning and a lamentation in all the land because of these things, and more especially among the people of Nephi.

12 And it came to pass that when I, Mormon, saw their lamentation and their mourning and their sorrow before the Lord, my heart did begin to rejoice within me, knowing the mercies and the long-suffering of the Lord, therefore supposing that he would be merciful unto them that they would again become a righteous people.

13 But behold this my joy was vain, for their sorrowing was not unto repentance, because of the goodness of God; but it was rather the sorrowing of the damned, because the Lord would not always suffer them to take happiness in sin.

I've seen people I love be so miserable that they constantly suffer--and they know it.  They know the connection between their choices and the painful consequences.  I've felt to rejoice, knowing that the mercies of the Lord are waiting when they feel the godly sorrow that leads to repentance.  I've even prayed at times that those I love will get to rock bottom more quickly--suffer more, faster--so they can get over it already and move on feeling the peace and joy that comes with repentance and forgiveness.

But, very often, it's not the faithful sorrow unto repentance that I've seen is the result, but what Mormon calls "the sorrowing of the damned."  True happiness will never come from sin.  The Lord couldn't make it so even if He wanted (Alma 42:15).

Faith is the missing ingredient.  It takes faith to ask God for forgiveness, and to want that forgiveness.  After my divorce it took me about eight weeks to get to that point, which was longer than it needed to be.  But moving from the sorrowing of the damned to the sorrowing unto repentance was the best decision I've made since.

The boundaries of freedom

I was reading 4 Nephi tonight.  Verse three says: "And they had all things common among them; therefore there were not rich and poor, bond and free, but they were all made free, and partakers of the heavenly gift (emphasis added)."

Several times the scriptures teach that freedom is present when one keeps God's commands.  As I thought about that while I was reading, I was struck by the oxymoronish nature of this teaching.  Restricting one's behavior to the boundaries set by the Lord makes you free, while exercising freedom outside those bounds enslaves you.  You are freer when you live within boundaries.

When I live as the Lord would have--keeping my behavior and my choices within the boundaries he has set--I am free in the sense that I have my agency before me. I can make a full range of choices at any time.  In short, as long as I'm righteous, I can always choose unrighteousness if I want.  Nicely, the more I'm successful at righteousness the less I want the opposite.

But when I make choices outside his boundaries, the consequences limit my future choices.  The Spirit withdraws, and temptation becomes stronger.  If I keep up that behavior, it can lead to the agency-limiting state of addiction.  The adversary has an ever greater hold on me.

In short, when I am close to God, my choices are always full and open.  When I'm closer to Satan, my choices become more limited.  It's always a choice to obey God, but when habit and addiction take over, my own will is more subject to the will of the adversary, which is the very definition of slavery.

That's why it's counter-intuitive, but true: "I, the Lord God, make you free, therefore ye are free indeed; and the law also maketh you free" (D&C 98:9).

Of course they would

Something has always puzzled me about the attitude from other Christian religions to the Book of Mormon.  In the New Testament, Christ specifically says that he has other children to bring into His fold (John 10:16).  He says they shall hear his voice.

Now, if there were other people who heard Christ's voice, wouldn't they write it down?  Of course they would.  And if they wrote it down, wouldn't God help preserve such a record, as He did the Bible, so His children could read of His dealings with them?  Of course!

In that sense, it ought to be more surprising if there weren't another testament of Jesus Christ.

Old Testament: No time wasted on characters

I was challenged to read the Old Testament, under the theory that Mormons tend to ignore reading most of the Bible in favor of The Book of Mormon.  In my own defense, I've studied the bible and am very familiar with the stories, but have never read it cover-to-cover.

So I'm now mostly through Genesis and just getting to the good part.  I've read Genesis before, but it was as a teenager, and I don't remember much about it. I remember thinking how it was possible that so many people and so much of history--from Adam to Moses--was squeezed into that one fairly short book.

And now I know.  Genesis wastes no time in character development.  It's a book retelling events in very short order.  Cain and Abel get less than a chapter for their whole story.  Noah comes and goes in a single night's reading.  Abraham and Isaac get a few more pages, but again no time spent on letting us know much about them--just which kids they have and by whom.  (I'm exaggerating for effect--I know that the story of the sacrifice of Isaac is good drama and good character development.)

Jacob gets more time, especially his relationship with Laban, so far, and I know that his relationship with his sons is about to take center stage.  Joseph's story is really the most detailed of Genesis.

Plus, I know all the songs.

The messages of Christmas

Whatever contemporary fads are about the meaning of Christmas, the best source to look for what Christmas should mean to us is God.  He actually sent the message He had for His children on the first Christmas night.

When Christ was born, angels came from Heaven with three messages for man, and these messages define what Christmas means.

1. "Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy."  Christmas is designed to celebrate the birth of the Savior, and should be a time of "great joy."  Regardless of what trials or unhappy situations we may find ourselves with more broadly, Christmas gives us reason to celebrate and be happy.  Why?  That's the second message.
2. "For unto you is born this day...a Savior, which is Christ the Lord."  Savior is the key word here.  Our salvation was born on this day.  That's a reason to celebrate, and also a reason to worship.  It's appropriate that Christmas is on Sunday this year, the day set aside to worship.  Christmas is a day to thank God for the gift of Salvation.  It's a day to reconcile ourselves to God.
3. Then the big choir of angels sings out, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men."  Since I covered worship in point two, here the message is one of peace and good will for our fellow man.  Christmas is a time for forgiveness--a time to reconcile ourselves with our fellow man, and bring peace and good will into our lives.

Herald angels singing.

Merry Christmas.

Helaman 12

Most of Helaman chapter 12 is a downer.  It rings true, pierces a little close to home, and is kind of more depressing because of that.  The first few verses are all about how quick we are to do evil.  Men are "unsteady," "hard hearted," "foolish," "vain," and "proud" (v 1-5).  Yup.  Guilty as charged.

And because we are so foolish, slow to remember God and quick to do iniquity, we face trials that remind us of our "nothingness."  God is all powerful, as explained in verses 8 through 21.

And the point of all this?  That's in verse 22: "And wo unto him to whom he shall say this (thou art cut off from my presence), for it shall be unto him that will do iniquity, and he cannot be saved."  Ouch.  That's what's said to those who do iniquity?  But in the early part of the chapter we see that that's everyone, and that it's everyone pretty much all the time.

But verses 22 and 23 resolve that conflict for us. "Therefore, for this cause, that men might be saved, hath repentance been declared. Therefore, blessed are they who will repent and hearken unto the voice of the Lord their God; for these are they that shall be saved."

We are all bound to be cut off because of iniquity.  But who is saved?  Those that do iniquity and then repent.

This chapter, which for much of it kind of serves to remind us how doomed we are, contains the two verses that let us know that no matter who we are, no matter what we've done, and no matter how many times we've done it, repentance and salvation are available to us.

Not that team

Satan is the captain of his team.  His team is powerful, and they win a lot.  (I was about to make a joke about the Yankees, here, but I'll forbear.)  Helaman 6 describes the adversary as "that being" who did the following:

• Entice Adam and Eve to take the forbidden fruit (v 26)
• Plot with Cain to kill his brother (v 27)
• Plot with Gadianton to carry on the works of secret murder (v 29)
• Is the author of all sin (v 30)

I look at that list, and other evils not on the list, and I'm sure I don't want to be on his team.  But the Nephites of Helaman 6 were on his team, were "building up and supporting" the earthly captains of it.

My prayer for myself is that I always recognize that when the Spirit withdraws from me because of my own actions, I'm building up and supporting my adversary.  If I recognize that my sins empower my greatest enemy, one who seeks my total destruction, then sin in stupid.