Over and over again

I read 1 Nephi chapter 16 today.  Here's what I learned.

There is a lot of murmuring and repenting going on in this chapter.  It starts out with Laman and Lemuel complaining that Nephi is being too hard on them (v 1).  Nephi knows this, but it's because they are self-conscious because of their own guilt, and they should be more diligent in keeping the commandments (v 3-4).  In verse 5, they repent.

This is a cycle seen in earlier chapters, and it is repeated here a few more times.  Well, the families all marry each other and get blessed exceedingly and honeymoon in fertile parts of the wilderness.  They get the Liahona and all goes well for a few days, and then Nephi's bow breaks.

So, more murmuring (v 20) because they get hungry.  Lehi joins in complaining against the Lord also.  Nephi again calls them to repentance (v 22), and then goes and makes a new bow and gets everyone some dinner.  The family appreciates this, and humbly repent again (v 24 and 32).

Doesn't last long, though, because Ishmael dies, and people murmur anew, this time going so far to plot the murder of their father and brother (v 36-37).  But, the Lord calls them to repentance again (v 38), and they repent again (v 39).

But was it really repentance?  This chapter makes it pretty clear that they aren't forsaking their sins, even if they confess and are called out for them.  The Lord probably sees this pattern, knows that they are likely to murmur again, and will surely just brush this hard-time repentance off as so much background noise.

Nope.  The Lord blessed them again (v 39).

That's what the Lord does.  My Stake President says that Jesus's favorite thing to do is forgive people.  And Laman and Lemuel and their followers aren't much different from us, in that they sin all the time.  And that their sins are often manifestations of the same weaknesses that they've exhibited before.

Yet, the Lord frankly forgives them, even though their pattern is obvious, and their repentance is caused by chastisement from others.

That's what we experience in our lives as well.  No wonder Jesus loves us so much.  We give him the opportunity to do his favorite thing over and over.

Stumbling Blocks

And it shall come to pass, that if the ^aGentiles shall hearken unto the Lamb of God in that day that he shall manifest himself unto them in word, and also in ^bpower, in very deed, unto the^ctaking away of their ^dstumbling blocks.

That's 1 Ne 14:1. This verse is spoken by the Angel that shows Nephi the vision of the Tree of Life, the Savior, and the future of his posterity.  What are stumbling blocks?  I looked up the footnote.

Isa. 57:14; Ezek. 7:19; 1 Cor. 1:23; 1 Ne. 13:34 (29, 34); 2 Ne. 26:20.


Ezekiel 7:19 expands a bit and calls them the "stumblingblock of their iniquity."  1 Cor 1:23 is about how the lack of faith being a stumbling block, whether one replaces his own wisdom ahead of faith (Greeks) or insists on a sign in order to believe (Jews).  The Book of Mormon references are about how the fallen church creates stumbling blocks for people by removing the "plain and precious" truths from the Bible.


But in reading 1 Ne 14:1, I thought of stumbling blocks as temptation, because I'm likening the scriptures to me and those I know.  And I like that interpretation best.  That if I do a better job of listening to and following the Lord, and I will have His word and power more, to the point that temptation is less of and eventually an overcome block that no longer causes me to stumble.


Wouldn't that be awesome?

Promptings or random thoughts

I hadn't realized it has been so long since I've posted.  It's because of baseball.  I announce for a minor league team, and since their season started a few weeks ago I've been working most Sundays with them and many other nights.  That and a social life has kept me away during my regular writing times.

Also, I've been reading the books of Chronicles in the Old Testament, which is a lot of repeated information from the books of Samuel and Kings, and hasn't struck me with things that I've felt to write, except for what I wrote the first time I read them, in the previous books.

So, today I'm thinking about prayers and promptings.  I've spent a lot of time praying for understanding and knowledge about what to do and say in several situations, including work, romance, missionary efforts, and family.

I'm trying to take the advice of my wonderful Stake President.  When I asked him how he could always feel so confident that the Spirit was prompting him what to say, he replied, "I try to live so that I have the companionship of the Spirit, and then I assume every thought I have the Spirit put there."

Further, he says sometimes he's wrong, but when that happens the Spirit stops him pretty strongly. So, that's where I'm going, just assuming that there's no need to try and differentiate between my own thoughts and spiritual promptings.  Just assume they are all guidance and I'll get stopped if I'm wrong.

Desire and capacity

There may be more, but I found two references in the Book of Mormon referencing the incredible change that took place as people became converted to Christ:

Mosiah 5, when King Benjamin completed his sermon (emphasis added)
1 And now, it came to pass that when king Benjamin had thus spoken to his people, he sent among them, desiring to know of his people if they believed the words which he had spoken unto them.

2 And they all cried with one voice, saying: Yea, we believe all the words which thou hast spoken unto us; and also, we know of their surety and truth, because of the Spirit of the Lord Omnipotent, which has wrought a mighty change in us, or in our hearts, that we have no more disposition to do evil, but to do good continually.

Alma 19, when Ammon's service and boldness had converted the people of Lamoni (emphasis added)
33 And it came to pass that when Ammon arose he also administered unto them, and also did all the servants of Lamoni; and they did all declare unto the people the selfsame thing—that their hearts had been changed; that they had no more desire to do evil.

Wouldn't that be nice?  To have no more disposition or desire to do evil?  I used to pray for that, that the Lord would take away any desire I had to ever sin again.  Not realistic in this life.

This life is designed to have us learn.  We learn by making mistakes.  Temptation will never be removed from us on Earth, because that's the primary way we make mistakes and learn from them.  I'm sure that Nephi also had no disposition to do evil, yet he was "easily beset" by temptations (2 Ne 4:18).  Paul certainly had a mighty change on the way to Damascus, and he still did the evil that he didn't want to do (Romans 7:19).  And though it's not specifically listed in the scriptures, I'm certain that every one of the people of King Benjamin and every citizen of Lamoni's kingdom sinned again at some point.
The Savior's sacrifice saves us from our sins, if that's what we desire.  The Atonement's power can overcome any and all of our sins, but not our agency, if what we desire is not Eternal Life.

The Mighty Change that we can experience in this life really can change our desires, but cannot, while on Earth, remove the sinful nature of the world we live in, nor of our need to learn to do good by sometimes doing evil.

We can want to do good continually, but we will always lack the capacity to do so. It gets frustrating, doesn't it?  To be able to want something and not have the ability to achieve it.  The Atonement gives us that ability, or rather, makes up for the fact that we lack it.

Repentance is the key.  In the end we'll be judged on our works and our desires.  And we'll probably have works that make it look like our desires weren't good.  By repenting daily for "the evil that I do" (Rom 7:19) I demonstrate that my desire is to do good, even if my actions don't always show it.

Alma 41 (emphasis added)3 And it is requisite with the justice of God that men should be judged according to their works; and if their works were good in this life, and the desires of their hearts were good, that they should also, at the last day, be restored unto that which is good.
4 And if their works are evil they shall be restored unto them for evil. Therefore, all things shall be restored to their proper order, every thing to its natural frame—mortality raised to immortality, corruption to incorruption—raised to endless happiness to inherit the kingdom of God, or to endless misery to inherit the kingdom of the devil, the one on one hand, the other on the other—
5 The one raised to happiness according to his desires of happiness, or good according to his desires of good; and the other to evil according to his desires of evil; for as he has desired to do evil all the day long even so shall he have his reward of evil when the night cometh.

You're probably doing better than you think

After my last post that quoted Nephi's lament about his own inadequacies, I read Falling to Heaven, by James L. Ferrell, who also wrote the wonderful The Peacegiver.  Ferrell points out that several other prophets make similar, er, confessions in the scriptures.  He quotes Alma laying out his past sins to his sons, Amulek's confession to his neighbors that he knew but ignored the hand of the Lord in his own life, and Joseph Smith for his.

My favorite that Ferrell brought up was the Apostle Paul.  I hadn't remembered this from him in his epistle to the Romans, chapter 7:

18 For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not. 19 For the good that I would I do not: but the evil which I would not, that I do.

Oh, how many times have I thought that?!  I know what's good, but I can't figure out how to do it. What I know I should and want to do, I don't do, but that which I know I shouldn't do, I do anyway.


And so does everybody else.  So did Paul.  So did Nephi, and Alma, and Joseph Smith, and our prophets and apostles today.  And you.


And even when we can temper our guilt with the fact that "no one need suppose me guilty of any malignant sins" (Joseph Smith—History 1:28), we still know that we fall utterly short of what we want and what God requires.


But I think it's a mistake of arrogance to allow our sinful nature to make us feel unworthy of blessings or goodness.  True humility would realize that we cannot do what is required of us, so we rely wholly on the power of the Atonement to make up the difference.  It isn't humble to compare ourselves to perfection, which is unattainable.

So our own laments should sound an awful lot like those of the prophets above, maybe even sounding very hard on ourselves, as we groan at our own wretchedness.  Then we rejoice in the goodness of the Lord who covers whatever gap we have.

What's the proper attitude to sin?

I'm not sure I have the title of this post right.  This dates from my trip to Mexico, when my travelling companions and I had a little fireside in our hotel room reading Believing Christ, by Stephen E. Robinson.  And even that was from a Sunday School lesson earlier in the year that included 2 Nephi 28.

In church I made the comment that people could use the Atonement as an excuse to sin.  "Christ has already suffered for all my sins, including every sin I've yet to commit."  I worry a little about the danger of having confidence in, but not love of, the Atonement. Essentially believing that no matter what you do, God will save you anyway, so might as well, "Eat, drink, and be merry; nevertheless, fear God—he will justify in committing a little sin; yea, lie a little, take the advantage of one because of his words, dig a pit for thy neighbor; there is no harm in this; and do all these things, for tomorrow we die; and if it so be that we are guilty, God will beat us with a few stripes, and at last we shall be saved in the kingdom of God."

So that's obviously not right.  Nephi provides what I figure I must consider the proper response to one's own sinful nature in 2 Nephi 4:

17 Nevertheless, notwithstanding the great goodness of the Lord, in showing me his great and marvelous works, my heart exclaimeth: O wretched man that I am! Yea, my heart sorroweth because of my flesh; my soul grieveth because of mine iniquities.

18 I am encompassed about, because of the temptations and the sins which do so easily beset me.

19 And when I desire to rejoice, my heart groaneth because of my sins; nevertheless, I know in whom I have trusted.

20 My God hath been my support; he hath led me through mine afflictions in the wilderness; and he hath preserved me upon the waters of the great deep.

21 He hath filled me with his love, even unto the consuming of my flesh.

... 

26 O then, if I have seen so great things, if the Lord in his condescension unto the children of men hath visited men in so much mercy, why should my heart weep and my soul linger in the valley of sorrow, and my flesh waste away, and my strength slacken, because of mine afflictions?

27 And why should I yield to sin, because of my flesh? Yea, why should I give way to temptations, that the evil one have place in my heart to destroy my peace and afflict my soul? Why am I angry because of mine enemy?

28 Awake, my soul! No longer droop in sin. Rejoice, O my heart, and give place no more for the benemy of my soul.

29 Do not anger again because of mine enemies. Do not slacken my strength because of mine afflictions.

30 Rejoice, O my heart, and cry unto the Lord, and say: O Lord, I will praise thee forever; yea, my soul will rejoice in thee, my God, and the rock of my salvation. 

There's more, and it's all good.


So I asked the question above, and Nephi's answer is the right one.  But how to apply that in my own life I'm still not sure.  How does one feel "wretched" like Nephi does while still rejoicing in one's heart for the Lord's condescension and mercy.


I worry that in practice one might end up feeling wretched and guilty to the point of despair, or feel so hopeful in ultimate salvation that the groaning for sins is simply skipped.


Nephi figured that out by the end of his life.  I'm still working on it.

Ignore the prophet when he says you're doing wrong

Making my way through the Old Testament, I laughed out loud at these verses in 1 Kings 22.

7 And Jehoshaphat said, Is there not here a prophet of the Lord besides, that we might enquire of him?
8 And the king of Israel said unto Jehoshaphat, There is yet one man, Micaiah the son of Imlah, by whom we may enquire of the Lord: but I hate him; for he doth not prophesy good concerning me, but evil.

And later on in the chapter, in fact Micaiah does prophesy that Ahab, the King of Israel, will die.  Ahab Dies.

Even when prophets say hard things, we should listen.